I don't know that I can really describe my day, but it's worth a shot anyway. I'm in New York, after a far too long absence. I haven't been here since August '05, for my bachelorette party (which is a whole story unto itself). Over the years, my trips to New York grew shorter and shorter, as I crammed in visits to CT to see my family with one or two night stops in the city to see my friends. They would do their best to join together for a night to see me, but the visits got increasingly farther apart and more difficult to arrange.
When I left New York, my gaggle of gals was already starting to fall apart at the seams-- not that we didn't love each other just as much as ever, but a lot of us got boyfriends, and at the same time, we were simply growing up. The nights of going out to drink heavily and look at boys weren't the same anymore. I can only speak for myself, and I was in the midst of a brand new relationship and choosing to spend all of my free time with Aaron, rather than going to bars late at night and talking to the same people about the same things. We were only together for 6 months before he moved to LA and I followed 6 months later, so there was never a time in New York when we didn't have that new relationship. Who knows what might have happened had Aaron and I stayed here. Maybe we would have had that life I've dreamt of, with my best friends and our significant others bonding over dinner parties. But I also know that I was stagnating here, ready to try another place at least for grad school, and the move to LA came at almost the perfect time. Granted, it was a hell of a lot farther away from my family and friends than I had ever expected to go, but it was new, and I've learned that I definitely have itchy feet when it comes to living in new places.
So point being, moving to LA has taken me very, very far away from a city that is familiar to me, full of life and energy. LA definitely has its own vibe, but it's more a place of hidden treasures and energy that needs to be discovered slowly and over time. New York is always in your face and never shy about revealing its best secrets.
I'm here for a whole week. That's longer than, well, maybe ever since I moved away almost 5 years ago. Today was like being plunked down into a maze that you're mostly familiar with, but still full of unexpected turns and twists. I started out on an incredibly long taxi ride from JFK to my brother's place. I've never even flown into JFK from LA. I've always gone to Hartford and taken a bus to NY for a day or two. I slept most of the way, so I didn't get to enjoy that feeling of crossing the distant skyline and entering into the city. In fact, once I got to the apartment I was so tired I couldn't appreciate anything besides the sight of a lovely sofa.
But once I woke up and got myself ready for the day, I think I covered a lifetime. I rediscovered my favorite bagel place across the street. How I could have forgotten about that amazing low fat tuna bagel is beyond me, but I blissfully ate it as I walked down to Union Square. Eating and walking. I've learned to love eating and driving, but had lost the joy of eating and walking. You wouldn't think you could enjoy the food that way, but I loved every bite.
I walked down to Union Square. It's a walk I always loathed when I lived here. Those 14 blocks get very redundant when you do it nearly every day, but today it was good to see which restaurants were still alive and try to remember which ones had disappeared. Union Square Park was teeming with lunchtime crowds enjoying the new sun after a long winter, and the Farmer's Market was going on. If my mother and I hadn't accidentally walked into a Farmer's Market this past weekend in the Ojai Valley (near Santa Barbara) on our mother-daughter getaway, I would be marveling over the beauty of running into an event like this, even though there's a weekly Farmer's Market literally down the street from my apartment in LA that I've never been to.
In the park I sat against a pole. Yes, a pole. It was the only spot available, and it's something I've done many times before. Turns out it was way too bright to see my computer, and at 1 p.m. the work day was slipping by fast. Then I got sprayed by an overzealous gardener behind me, so I looked offended and stalked off to Starbucks, where I paid $10 for 24 hours of internet service. I used about 1 hour. Then I headed way off to the Upper East Side to drop off my co-workers' luggage to their hotel, and very proudly took the bus across town to the West Side to meet my best friend Sarah. I know people who have lived in New York for years and have never taken a bus. Then I did my work in the offices of the Museum of Natural History where Sarah works. Now how many people, even die-hard New Yorkers, get to work inside the Museum of Natural History?
Seeing Sarah was soul satisfying. It literally is one of those friendships that will always be so bonded that it doesn't matter how far apart we are. At the same time, I did feel an overwhelming nostalgia that almost hurt. We used to have so much fun together, and spent every other day together. She slept over my apartment every Wednesday in honor of Beverly Hills 90210, even long after the show was canceled. It turned into our thing-- Wednesday was when we hung out. For a while we made it our cultural activity night, whether it was a play, a flamenco guitar night (yes, that really happened) or seeing some crappy band play in a bar. We can't do that anymore, not just because of the distance, but because I have no patience for listening to crappy music in a bar. Bad plays, yes, music, no.
Sarah and I spent the evening falling right back into our normal rhythms. We worked in the office, we puttered around, we made our way back downtown, and we found a restaurant that was perfectly suited to our appetites (City Crab...sushi and soft-shell crab, mmmm). We shared every dish, just like we always do.
After dinner, I only had to walk a few blocks, where my brother and a lifelong friend were at an afterparty for a movie premiere. Just 9 blocks away and I got to spend a time socializing with my brother without having to plan or arrange anything. I didn't even know it was a party, I just thought it was an Indian restaurant with a hell of a lot of Indians in it. In LA, there's no such thing as an accidental premiere party. If you're getting in the car, you know where you're going. And to see that childhood friend was an extra unexpected surprise. We took the subway uptown together, which was more time than we've ever spent together outside of our families' homes.
From there--yes, it was a busy day--I went all the way back uptown to hang out with my coworkers for a few minutes. After my day remembering my life in New York, it was interesting to be able to bitch and moan about work, something that's part of my LA experience. But it didn't feel strange at all.
Finally, I took a taxi back home. And lo and behold, I had the most amazing cab drive. Ibo, the Turkish pianist/taxi driver. In a 15-minute cab ride, he managed to give me three pearls of wisdom and marital advice, which I immediately texted to Aaron. I can't actually remember all the pearls, but my favorite was definitely "When a camel says he's the biggest camel of all, the elephant appears on the horizon." You had to be there.
There's no way to make this very long story short, or to even sum it up with a point. But I do realize that I'm very grateful to have New York in my blood. And if to really appreciate it means never moving back here again, I'm just fine with that.
